Couples and Marriage Counselling Singapore

Relationships can be challenging at times. Conflicts can arise when there are differences in points of view or when there are unresolved emotional hurts. 

 

Sometimes, conflicts can be resolved easily, and the relationship can go back to calm and peace. However, when conflicts persist or when couples get stuck in a rut of negative communication cycle, negative feelings such as bitterness and resentment can start to breed, causing rupture and disharmony in the relationships. 

 

Whether you are still dating, married or divorce, we have the counselling service for you to help with your relationship and communication challenges.

Types of couples, marriage and divorce counselling services we offer:

Pre Marriage Counselling
Marriage Counselling
Marriage Counselling
Pre-Divorce, Separation & Divorce Counselling

At Sylvia Tan Psychology Consultancy, we have helped many couples improve their communication with each other, deepen their connection and affection for each other or find a way forward for their relationship.

 

Using evidence based therapies like Gottman Couples Therapy and Cognitive Behavioural Couples Therapy, we have helped both local and expat couples work through challenges in their relationships.

You don't have to struggle on your own – we're here to support you!

Our Therapeutic Approach

Sylvia Psychology Therapeutic Approach

At Sylvia Tan Psychology, we have extensive experience working with couples at different stages of their relationship. Our work relies on therapeutic approaches like Gottman Couples Therapy and Cognitive Behaviour Couples Therapy and we work closely with you to align with your goals and aspirations for your relationships.

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What is Gottman Couples Therapy ?
The Gottman Coupes Therapy

The Gottman Couples Therapy is a form of couples therapy developed by Dr. John Gottman and Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman. It is based on a Sound Relationship House theory which specified 9 components to healthy relationships. The 9 components are: 

 

1) Build love maps: This is about couples getting to know one another better. It’s learning to hear and learn about each other’s inner psychological worlds. This would require couples to share openly about their inner thoughts, feelings, hopes and dreams.  

 

2) Share fondness and admiration: This is about learning to express appreciation and respect for each other to strengthen their bond.

 

3) Turn towards, not away: This is about learning to notice when one’s partner is seeking attention, affection, and comfort and how to respond appropriately and lovingly.  

 

4) The positive perspective: This is about learning to see one another positively, seeing errors as matters of circumstance, not failures of the individual.

 

5) Manage conflict: This is about learning to manage conflict effectively.

 

6) Make life dreams come true: This is about supporting and championing one’s partner in their dreams and goals.

 

7) Create shared meaning: This is about finding rituals and stories that have shared meaning for the couple. This helps with bonding and building a shared connection with each other. 

 

8) Trust and commitment: The two weight-bearing walls of the Sound Relationship House help couples work through the seven floors. Trust is about being able to rely on one another and feel like they’re a team, and commitment is about sticking together no matter what to improve their relationship.

The Sound Relationship House

Interventions used in the Gottman Method are based on 40 years of research done by Dr John and Julie Gottman. The interventions are geared towards disarming conflicting verbal communication; increasing intimacy, respect, and affection; removing barriers that create a feeling of stagnancy, and creating a heightened sense of empathy and understanding within the context of the relationship.

What is Cognitive Behavioural Couples Therapy?
Cognitive Behavioural Couples Therapy

Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT) is an evidenced based therapy to help people identify unhelpful thoughts patterns that affect their mood and behaviours. It is usually used for individual therapy but this approach can also be used for couples to help couples identify unhelpful patterns of thinking and perceptions that have contributed to unhealthy patterns of communication, negative emotions and behaviors towards one another. 

 

The therapy will involve helping couples reframe negative thoughts so as to improve the way they view their partner, themselves and their relationship. 

 

There will also be a component of helping couples get in tune with each other’s emotions. As couples share their feelings about how certain situations or thoughts trigger a certain feeling, a deeper understanding and empathy for each other can be engendered.

How do I know I need couples or marriage counselling?
Couples and Marriage Counselling
  • When one or both parties are losing interest in sex with the other party
  • Infidelity or multiple affairs
  • Communication breakdown 
  • Ongoing feelings of hurt and resentment 
  • Feelings of contempt towards partner 
  • Conflict in parenting styles 
  • Conflict over finances
  • Having conflict stemming from different cultural background
  • Feeling the need to control or feeling controlled by the partner or spouse

 

Couples counselling or marriage counselling can help with 

  • Breakdown in communication 
  • Infidelity 
  • Disagreements and conflicts
  • Misalignment of goals 
  • Depression and anxiety 
  • Issues surrounding infertility 
  • Conflicts involving in laws 
  • Differences in parenting 
  • Differences in values 
How does couples counselling work ?
Couples Counselling Work

Couples counselling starts off with an initial assessment. The first session is a joint session for the couple. The couple therapist will ask the couple to share what the problem has been for them. The therapist may give them a questionnaire to complete and ask them questions about the relationship or marriage. 

 

After the initial joint session, the therapist will have separate individual sessions with each party. This is where the couple therapist will gather more information about past history and each party’s own family background and upbringing. After the individual sessions, the couple will come back together for joint sessions, and the couple therapist will work closely with the couple to identify the goals for therapy and map out areas of the relationship to focus on. 

 

The duration for couples counselling can vary from couples to couples. Minimally, 6 sessions will be required for intervention to take place. Typically couples counselling can range from 6 to 12 sessions. You can discuss with your therapist the frequency of sessions and how many sessions will be required.

Our Counselling Psychologist

Sylvia Tan - Founder, Principal Counselling Psychologist, MPsych (SRP Registered)

Sylvia is a Counselling Psychologist practicing in Singapore. She holds a Master’s Degree in Counselling Psychology from Curtin University of Technology ( Perth, Western Australia) and is currently a registered counselling psychologist and a clinical supervisor with the Singapore Register of Psychologists (SRP). 

 

After her graduation in 2002, Sylvia lived and worked in Australia for many years before her relocation back to her home country Singapore in 2014. To date, Sylvia has over 20 years of experience working in a range of settings both in Australia and Singapore. 

Get In Touch

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